weekend Broadcast

Emotional Healing - Moving Beyond Treating Symptoms, Part 2

From the series Does God Still Heal?

God does, in fact, heal today, but often our presuppositions and expectations prevent Him from accomplishing all that He wants to in our lives. This series, from James 5, will help you sort through the many and conflicting voices in our day about the issues of healing.

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Message Transcript

We have been taught to cope with our symptoms rather than learn how to heal the source. And there’s a proper time to get counseling and there is a proper time under a doctor’s guidance where medication is needed. There’s a proper time for support groups and help groups and small groups.

There’s a proper time for pastoral counseling and professional counseling. There’s a proper time for all those things, but what I would suggest is that if you’re not careful and if we’re not careful, what we really do is try and manage the symptoms.

And, by the way, there’s a lot of improper ways that we manage our symptoms as well, aren’t there? We are not hungry, but we eat. The obesity in our country isn’t because people are hungry. It’s called what? Comfort food. Whether it’s eating too much or shopping too much or drinking too much or working too much, we do lots of things to quiet the pain.

We go on adventure or  adreneline runs. And what I want you to know is that God wants to heal, not just the syptoms, but the source. And He is going to give us a prescription for how that happens.

That happens in James chapter 5, beginning in verse 13. And we have God’s prescriptrion for emotional healing. And even as I read this, you will be shocked at its simplicity. In fact, you might be so shocked you say, There is no way this can work. But I think by the end of our time, if you’re willing to practice God’s prescription, you’ll experience some powerful things.

God’s prescription for emotional healing is, for emotional distress, His Rx is, you can write the word in, pray. Pray. And I assure you, it’s not just some common prayer, but there is a type of prayer that brings emotional healing.

He says in verse 13, “Is anyone among you troubled?” The word means afflicted, suffering, enduring hardship or distress. Misfortune of any kind. It’s the trouble, the emotions, the difficulty, the pain, the anxiety, the stress. “Are you troubled?” You lost your house, you have broken up in a relationship, health problems, discouraged, you’re distressed. Are you troubled? And, by the way, it’s, “Is anyone among you…?” This is for individuals.

When you are troubled, when I am troubled, when I am sad, when I feel bad, when I feel discouraged, when I want to give up, when I am angry, when I am troubled, God says, “Pray.” To which you are thinking, Um, I’ve actually done that, but it’s not working so well for me.

The second one is, for emotional delight, the Rx is “sing.” “Is anyone,” notice, specifially, an actual person, not just singing in a group like you did earlier, not just worship in a church, but individually, are you happy? And this word means, not just like an emotional light or boistrous, or, “I feel, ooh, happy.”

But it’s that attitude of inner delight, even if circumstances are bad. You know that flickering up inside of joy, that sense of satisfaction? That, Oh, God. Thank You. The connection of a relationship, the accomplishment of a goal, the sense of watching God work in people’s lives. He says the Rx is to sing.

And so God has some solutions. What I want to encourage us to do is say: What if rather than the symptoms, there was actually a way to come into God’s presence in the way that He has shown us, where He could heal what is behind why I go to the refrigerator. What’s behind that addiction? What’s behind the explosion in anger? What’s behind why I shut everything down and work, work, work, work, work?

Could God heal my emotions? Turn the page and let’s discover exactly what he says and how. Because I am guessing some of you are saying, You know what? I have got struggles and I’ve got pain and I’ve got hurts and I have actually, I have prayed. I have really prayed, “Oh, God, will You please help me? And, God, my job situation here and I’ve got a breakup in a relationship here. One of my kids is struggling here. Our marriage is…”

And you have prayed and you’ve prayed and you would say to me, And when I got done, I still felt kind of bad! It’s hard to say out loud, but it’s like, I prayed and it didn’t work.

And so the question you’ll notice on your notes is: What kind of prayer, what kind of prayer brings about the kind of change that we are talking about? And I am going to tell you that there are two kinds of prayer.

And one I will describe by an experience. Many, many years ago, I was teaching, coaching basketball, I lived in a little apartment by myself with about two rooms. And I was leading a college discipleship ministry. And there was a fellow who came.

And Bob had a very difficult, difficult childhood. Rejection by his father, multiple rejections afterwards. And if you have ever been around one of those people who, they have this tape. And the first time you hear it, your heart just goes out to them and you go, Oh my gosh. You went through that and you went through that and you went through that and you went through that and, oh, wow. And you listen.

And then you’re with them again and it’s like you ask them about something, and it’s like they punch a button and the tape plays and you hear exactly the same thing. Right?

And then you’re with them with someone else and someone says, “How are you guys doing?” And Bob plays the tape and, “Oh, man, my childhood was terrible. My dad treated me this way and actually, in high school, I was rejected. And junior high people made fun of me! And everywhere I have gone…”

And it’s like, and I’m thinking, Man, I’ve known the guy three weeks. I have heard this story, like, fourteen times.

And you’re up until two in the morning and talking, talking, talking, talking, talking, talking, counseling. And, What about this, Bob? What about this, Bob? Bible studies together.

And so finally I said, “Bob! I have heard this story a hundred and forty-four times. Why don’t you just pray?” He goes, “I do! It doesn’t do any good.”

“Alright. We are going to pray and we are going to pray right now.” Okay. Get this thing out here, it’s a hard, wooded floor, we are going to be holy about this. “Get down on our knees, Bob. Okay, Bob, okay, right. Bob, you go first and then I’ll pray. Alright.” I bow my head, he bows his head.

Oh, God, you know what my father did to me. You know where I have been through. You know how I was rejected in junior high. Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi, yi, yi, yi, yi.

And I feel like he is whining to God like he is whining to me! He got done and I said something like, God, please help him. I can’t. And, see, there is a kind of prayer that God uses, and there is a kind of prayer that really doesn’t work.

Whining in the presence of God, where you’re the victim, telling God how difficult everything is, and asking Him for magic bullets to make everything go away, rather than facing the cause – I feel rejected, I feel hurt – is there a place and is there a person that totally and completely loves me for who I am? And what does it mean to be in Christ and be accepted and be a son and be a daughter, and to believe that I have an inheritance and that I’m adopted and that I am special and that I am loved? And to live out of who the new person I am.

And I heard another guy named Dave pray when he was going through a rough time. Dave had been through a horrendous life. He was very affluent. In a weak moment, committed adultery. Later, killed someone. In a moment of pride, actually made a decision that cost thousands of people to lose their lives.

And I heard Bob pray on my living room floor. And when I heard Dave pray, I thought, I think that might be illegal. I can’t believe how he talks to God. And the Dave that I am talking about is the David of Scripture. The David who, when God heard this man and saw this man, in spite of his tremendous failure and sin, said, This is David, a man after My own heart.

One third of all the psalms are called “lament psalms.” And there is a type of praying in a lament psalm where you meet God, where you don’t deny, you don’t make excuses, you don’t blame, you don’t whine. You face what you really feel, you get raw at a level, and you bring it to God and there’s a three-step process. And in the midst of this, God heals our emotions. Sometimes instantaneously, sometimes over time.

Prayers that heal emotions include three parts and they are called “laments.” About fifty of the one hundred and fifty psalms are in this category. Well, what is the pattern? Number one, you recount your pain. You recount it.

Not, “I’m a victim,” and whine about it. No denial, no repression, no stuffing, no self-pity, no complaining. You recount it.

Second, you recall God’s character. When you recount it, there’s honest emotions, there’s graphic language.

He is raw. He’s earthy.

See, “The Lord is near to those who call upon Him,” Psalm 145:18, “to those who call upon Him in truth.” Genuine healing always is about grace, but grace and truth are always connected for healing to occur.

Open your Bibles to Psalm 13. It’s a song of lament. He recounts his pain, you’ll notice he is going to recall God’s character, and then number three, notice there’s a choice that he makes. He resolves to trust.

So this is really, really simple. You want emotional healing when you’re going through difficult times, number one, you recount the pain – specifically and honestly.

Number two, you recount God’s character. Wait a minute. This is all how I feel, this is what I have been through, but this is who God is. And then you resolve. You make a decision, not because you feel like it, but to trust. And that’s what begins the healing process.

Listen to Psalm 13. If I was a psychologist and I was sitting on a couch and I was listening to this, see, we don’t live in biblical language. We live in therapeutic language. So I’ll give you a picture of how this might go.

Here is David praying, “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will you hide Your face from me?” In our day, we would say he has abandonment issues. He does. He’s not experiencing God. He prays, nothing happens. He feels alone. He feels isolated. He feels discouraged. But what is he doing? He’s not processing those emotions and going different places. How long, God? How long? You made me, You love me, You died for me, You rose from the dead. I don’t like this. Are You going to forget me forever? Are You going to hide Your face from me? I want to know! When was the last time you prayed like that?

“How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and everyday have sorrow in my heart?” You know what anxiety is? You ever been there where you can’t think on one thing? And you are bombarded by thoughts? And you don’t know where to go? And this thought is and you leave something in this room and you go to the next room. And then you try to start on something and you’re distracted by something else and you feel like, at times, like you’re almost going out of your mind.

I am bombarded with my thoughts, and then he says what? “Everyday sorrow in my heart.” He is depressed. He is bummed out. He doesn’t feel good. He feels absolutely abandoned, he has high levels of anxiety, and he is depressed.

“How long will my enemies triumph over me?” And now, if it’s really happening, he is realizing, I’ve got external circumstances that I can’t control, and they are winning.

Here is a guy that his emotions are in a very bad place. And there are no therapists in his day. “Look on me and answer me, O Lord my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death.” I don’t know if I can keep going! Have you ever been there? You ever felt like, I just can’t take this another day. I can’t go on. God, if You don’t intervene, if You don’t do something, I can’t go on. That’s what he is saying. It’s raw. It’s honest.

“My enemies will say,” and then if I bail out, my enemies will say, “‘I have overcome him,’ and my foes will rejoice when I fall.” Notice the turning now in the psalm. What he has done, that’s how I feel. That’s how I really feel. That’s not, I was one of the youngest kids and my dad really didn’t give me much attention, my older brothers were really down on me when God told me He was going to use me, I have a personality that a little bit more sensitive than others and I…

I think we spend a little bit more time trying to figure out why we are the way we are and I think what David does here is say, This is where I’m really at. “But I trust in Your unfailing love.” By the way, at the heart of curing every addiction and every problem – what I need, what you need, what everyone is looking for, and whether we look for it in sex or work or shopping or a bottle or fame or a drug or from a counselor – we want to be loved. There’s a miraculous thing that happens is you just for you, apart from anything you have done, will do, or could ever do, that you just for you are an object of deep, unfailing love.

And he says, “I trust in Your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in Your salvation.” He is looking back to what God has done. I’m going to focus now on the facts. You have delivered me. My feelings are in the toilet. But I am going to choose to look at the facts and who You are and what You have done.

And then notice, “I will sing to the Lord for He has been good to me.” Notice, “I will.” It’s a choice. Bob, often I would talk with him and we would try and work through issues and I would say, “Bob, you can’t pray like that. You need to pray like that.” “I just can’t. I’m just too down.” And finally, “Bob, do you want to stay the way you are forever?” “No.” “Then stop making excuses and start making choices.”

The most loving, kind, available, powerful Being in the universe is waiting for you. In fact, in the words of Isaiah, he would say this: You come and state your cause. Let’s have an argument that you could be proved right. God is longing to hear from you. Not some, Help everything to go okay. Bail me out of this situation.

Just listen to your prayers sometimes. How often your prayers and mine are really about, God, fix this; change that; make this work. Why? So I can be happy, so I can feel like I’m back in control, so I can feel like things will go…

And God says, Wait a second. Why don’t you come and why don’t we get, not to coping with the symptoms. Let’s get really, really honest. How do you really feel? Where have you really been hurt? And why don’t you lay it out as straightforward and painfully, and then I want you to stop and remember: I love you.

You know that cross that some of you have around your neck or that cross that you see in the Bible? While you were yet a sinner, while I was yet a sinner, Christ died in your place. God demonstrated His love for you. He cares about you. He is for you.