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I Will Never Give Up!: Overcoming the Valleys of Discouragement, Part 1

From the series Be Strong and Courageous 

Imagine being a soldier on the battlefield; one of the most treacherous situations is finding yourself in a valley. You open yourself up to danger from every direction and cannot anticipate the threats that lurk ahead. Chip uncovers the most dangerous spiritual valley a Christian can face in this program and provides vital strategies for navigating and escaping it. Don't be caught off guard—learn what it takes to stay vigilant and protected.

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Message Transcript

You know, sometimes I forget that life is a journey. You know, there are mountains and there’s valleys and I try to focus on: I’m a child of God, I’m forgiven, I’m loved, I’m empowered, there’s a call on my life, and that God has an agenda. He has an agenda for you and me as followers of Jesus and He wants to love people, He wants to forgive people, He wants to restore people, He wants hungry people to get fed and little kids to get cared for and, you know, I get excited about that.

It's an exciting and amazing adventure to be a follower of Jesus. And especially when you have that focus and He is using your life. And we are also human and that means we get physically tired or we get emotionally exhausted. We get spiritually discouraged. And what I have found is I just forget that life really is this journey. And there are mountains and there are valleys and when I’m in the valley I usually think something is really wrong. I mean, what is wrong with me? I mean, am I out of sync with God? You know, my life is all messed up.

And here’s what I would say. When you get in one of those, I call them valleys of discouragement, it can be a very, very dangerous place. In fact, I would say that more than all the moral failures or more than getting into some, you know, cult or a hideous sin, the great majority of God’s people, I mean, the massive majority of God’s people that get taken out of commission and aren’t really used and have lost their joy and don’t have this intimate relationship with God and are often very discouraged sort of as with a negative worldview.

My sense is it started very subtly. And they were in one of those valleys. You have been there, I know, we all have. In fact, the encouraging thing I love about the psalms and studying the psalms and, I can’t remember when I discovered this, because as my wife has told me, “Chip, you have very high standards for yourself.” My kids have said, “Dad, you’ve got high standards for everyone! You could make us all nuts.”

But part of that is what I have found is when everything wasn’t sort of really being and doing what I thought it was supposed to, I automatically thought there was something wrong with me. You know, where have I erred? What’s gone wrong? And then as I started studying the psalms, you know, David, a man after God’s own heart, David the warrior, David the king, David that wrote half of the book of psalms, greatly used by God.

And I started reading the psalms and it was like: Life is great, God is all powerful, everything is fantastic.

My life stinks, I can’t believe You have left me, everyone has betrayed me. And I begin to watch that David was a great man of God and you know what? David was human. He had ups and he had downs just like you and me. And I want to start our time talking about that, because I’m really concerned that maybe some of you are a little bit too much like me and that when you have some downs and you have some discouragements or things aren’t going well, you start to either question yourself or you question God or you question God’s plan.

And if you don’t know how to handle discouragement, it can be a very, very dangerous place, because it is lethal. Let me share a story with you about what I would just say is the most discouraging moment in my Christian life probably in the first seven to ten years. And I came to Christ right after high school, college and playing basketball, and college ministry, and then teaching school and coaching and, you know, I had some minor ups and downs. And then this big call from God. I mean, I was so surprised that I’m supposed to be in full-time ministry? I thought that was for other people, smarter people, more holy people than me.

But, okay! You know? I raised my hand and put everything in a truck with my wife and we go to seminary and I’m at about three years in and the schedule, because I wanted my wife to be at home, was pretty much be up at four, four-thirty at the latest, go over to the donut shop, get a cup of coffee, study for three hours, especially get my Greek done, get a carpool, go to school, in between every class run over and study, study, study, read, read, read. Get home at about, you know, four-thirty. Play with the kids for an hour, eat dinner, then go to work from six to eleven. I did that for three years that was the rhythm.

And I remember sitting in class, in fact, if you have ever read the Ryrie Study Bible, I still remember, it was Dr. Ryrie’s class, a theology class. And I think, over time, physically, emotionally, and spiritually whatever metaphor, I mean, my spiritual tank, my emotional tank, my relational tank, I mean, there just was fumes. And I have never experienced this before or after. And I remember sitting in this class and you know how we talk to ourselves?

I remember just, I don’t know, he was talking about something and there was about two hundred people in this room, you know, one of those rooms that, you know, stair-steps up and I was about the middle. And I’m just thinking, you know, So, this is how You reward Your servants, God? This was in my mind. So, you know, I left a career that I loved, I married a girl that loves God with all of her heart and I make her crazy and she makes me crazy. I don’t have any money, I can’t pay my bills, I live in this tiny apartment, I have moved all the way across the country, I’m away from all the family, all the support. I’m done.

Literally, I mean, I’m telling God, I’m done. And I was just discouraged, discouraged, discouraged. And I was in a stupor. And I use that word, I mean, very specifically because somehow, I’m sitting there and the next thing I get is a tap on my shoulder and I look up and it’s Dr. Ryrie.

And the room is empty. And I’m thinking, where did everybody go or where was I when they left? And it was very interesting. He looked down at me, he was a thin man and wore those wire-rimmed glasses. And he knew me; we had talked a little. And he looked at me in a calm way and he said, “Chip?” “Yes, Dr. Ryrie?” He said, “I want you to go home and get two good night’s sleep, I want you to make sure you have a good meal or two, and then make a commitment to me that you won’t make any big decisions in the next couple of days.”

“Okay.” You know, got in the carpool, went home. And when I slept for a couple good days, I ate a couple good meals, did some thinking, processed it out loud with Theresa. I’m telling you, I came that close to cashing in, I’m just not going to do this.

I’m telling you, I have had so many times that I have just been so discouraged, but from that experience that I talked about, there was a go-to passage. There was a passage that God spoke to me about that when I get there or when I even get close to there, I go to Psalm 103. And I declare out loud, right? We have a declaration for each of these. “I will never give up.” I will not be overcome by the power and the valleys of discouragement. I will not let circumstances, my emotions, and my fatigue cause me to give up. I will not give up.

And then I go to Psalm 103 and Psalm 103 is the antidote to the discouragement and to the want-to-give-up and how God wants to sustain us in the midst of it. Psalm 103 starts with, “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget none of His benefits,” and then he begins to list them, “who pardons all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion, who satisfies your years with good things so that your youth is renewed like an eagle.”

Notice first who David is talking to. He’s talking to himself. He’s thinking: You know, I don’t feel like blessing or praising God. I’m not doing well. The context, we don’t know all that is happening, but what we know is that he is talking to himself and saying: David, soul, you need to bless God, you need to praise God right now whether you feel like it or not. And then you need to do it from the heart. Bless the Lord, praise God in my innermost being with all my innermost being.

Get real, share it from your heart, begin to really say, “God, thank You, praise You.” And by the way, it’s a choice. I don’t think he feels like it and when we get here, we often don’t feel like it. He says, “Praise the Lord,” and then he says, “Forget none of His benefits.” And here’s the key, here’s the turning point. When I was sitting in that class, my self-talk, I had listed all the bad and forgot the good, all the problems and forgot all the progress, all the deficits and forgot all the pluses.

And what David is saying here is you have to pull yourself up by the scruff of the neck and you’ve got to say, “Look, you may feel that way. You may be tired, you may be emotionally exhausted, you may be spiritually discouraged. Guess what, welcome to the spiritual NFL. Every saint, every person, every missionary, every pastor, every businessman, every mom, every dad, every student finds themselves in a valley at times. There’s nothing wrong with you, you’re normal, you’re human.

It doesn’t mean God doesn’t love you anymore, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, it means you’re empowered, you’re loved, you’re forgiven, you’re a child of God, and it’s really hard right now. And so, what do you do? He says: Here’s what you do. You choose to bless God. And then here’s how. He says, “Don’t forget His benefits.” Jot this down in your brain, will you? There’s power in remembering. Remember, remember, remember. In fact, there’s such power in remembering that God wrote an entire book, Deuteronomy.

And after He tells all the story of creation and all that has happened and the great Exodus. And then He gives them all these rules in Leviticus. Before they could go into the Promised Land, Deuter-onomy: Second law.

And if you read through Deuteronomy, it’s, “Remember, remember, remember, remember.” You know why? Because we forget. And when you’re tired, what you remember is the pain. When you’re discouraged, all you can see is what is not right. When you are spiritually struggling, all you can do is look inward and you get into self-pity. And so, notice the very specifics that he wants us to remember. He says, “Who forgives all your sins.”

If you have your Bible open, circle some of these words so that when you go back and read it next time, you’ll remember. “Who heals all your diseases.” Heals. “Who redeems your life from the pit,” remember? you were saved, “who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion, who satisfies your years with good things.” Why? “So that your youth” or your vigor, your perspective, “is renewed like the eagle.”

Notice there is forgiveness, that’s a spiritual blessing, your salvation. Then notice He heals your diseases. Physical blessing. Notice there is redemption. That’s eternal life. Notice He crowns you. It’s a picture of God’s favor and blessing and friendships and family and gifts and he’s looking back on his life and saying: I’m going through the mile markers of the major things in my life, what God has done for me.

I don’t feel like it, but I have told my soul, we are having this conversation because my soul is discouraged, my soul is not going to a good place. And I’m saying to myself, Hey, come on now. We need to praise God. Well, where do you do it? Let’s start remembering what He has done. I am forgiven, I am on my way to heaven, I have been redeemed, I have been pulled out of the pit of darkness and I have new standing. God has crowned me with lovingkindness, He has blessed my life, I have experienced His favor, I have experienced His presence, He has done great things, He has answered prayers.

If you want to begin to turn things around when you’re discouraged, remember that giving praise to God is a choice and remember that not forgetting is something you have to do. And so, I literally have a little journal and I write in it when I get discouraged. And I’ll say, “What are God’s blessings?” And I’ll write, “Family.” Then I’ll jot a line or two about: Do I have issues in my family? Everybody has issues in their family, and so do you. But I’ve got a lot of blessings. And then maybe friends. And think about, who are your friends? Who has God brought into your life? Who has been there for you?

And then in my case, it’s ministry. You know, I’m pretty excited about when I look at the positive, God has done a number of things and He has let me be a part of it. Of finances.

Even if it’s hard right now. Think of where most of the world is and think of where you are. I mean, some of these things you can give more thanks for than other times. But I just take these areas: my work, answers to prayer, spiritual growth, God’s comfort in adversity, things He has done in my life.

Often, when I have just a little bit of a discouragement and, you know, this is true of everyone, especially pastors and others, but I don’t get up every single morning going, “Yes, I love God! We are going for it! We are going to make a difference together!” You know what? I have mornings like, yes, I go look at the stars. I have my cup of coffee, I feel really tired, and here’s what I feel like, God, I know You really love me today, but I don’t really, I don’t really feel like reading my Bible and, you know, okay, it was a late night and, oh boy, I started to pray but it’s so superficial. I don’t really feel like praying either.

And what I know is I can say, “Well, I’ll catch You tomorrow.” I’ve done that before. But what I have learned instead is to get a pen out and I open my little journal and I say, “Dear God, I don’t feel like praying today. And I don’t really want to meet with You, but I know that You’re there. And I also know that if I live my life according to my feelings, I’ll not be the man I want, I’ll not have the relationships that I want, and my life won’t ever turn out the way I want. And so, I want to stop right now and I just want to remember some of Your blessings.”

I literally, I mean, I just, I just do this. I’ll put a little dash. “God, thank You for Theresa. She loves me when I’m good, when I’m bad. Lord, thank You for Eric. Thank You for Jason. Thank You for Ryan. Thank You for Annie. God, thank You so much that… And I just yesterday, so-and-so called me and I haven’t heard from them in ages. Lord, thank You that so-and-so dropped in and we had a cup of coffee. Lord, I almost forgot to thank You…”And I just start writing. And I’ll fill out a page and it only takes about ten minutes.

And by the time I get done remembering, even what God did yesterday or if I’m a little bit more discouraged then I’ll flip back maybe four or five days or a week or so of pages because I have written prayers. Oh, You did that, You did that, You did that.

And what I’ll do is I’ll remember the faithfulness of God. Remembering God’s past faithfulness will empower you to trust Him for the future. That’s what David is doing. You need to remember when you are discouraged, you just choose to do it when you’re discouraged, it will empower you to move ahead, to break through those feelings, and begin to walk with God.