Teach Them to Make Wise Choices

We make our choices and then our choices make us. Some of our good choices have resulted in a happy marriage, a great job, and deep personal satisfaction. Some of our poor choices have resulted in destroying a marriage, losing a job, and suffering shame and reproach.

Few things will determine the quality and the fulfillment of your life more than the choices you make for better or for worse.

I have heard someone say that when you boil it all down, you will probably make a half a dozen very major, important choices about God, about future, about relationships, and about how to deal with some difficult things in your life that will determine all of your life.

So I just want you to mentally think about, What are maybe the top two or three choices you have made? And some of you just need to remember you have made some good choices.

Okay, now, I want to go to the other side. Just what is one choice that you have made that, if you could take this one back, you would take it back? One choice you made in the past that you just thought, Oh my. That was dumb. In fact, that was worse than dumb. That was biblically unwise. In fact, that choice cost me a lot.

And it could be a choice that cost you a lot of money, it could be a choice that cost you a relationship, it could be a choice that, in just a quick moment of time and it was like, it promised a lot of pleasure but it really delivered a lot of pain. Can you think of any?

Now, here is why I want you to get your emotions around that instead of just your head and your heart. In like manner, there are few gifts that you will give to those that are coming behind you, okay? This whole series is about passing on the things that matter most.

And when you think about that person you’re wanting to help grow spiritually, or that child of yours, or that grandchild, or someone in church, or someone who is looking to you and you want to pass on what matters most, few things could be a greater gift than you giving them the skill and the ability to make wise choices.

In fact, I would go out on a limb and say: To give people wealth without wisdom is to sentence them to a life of folly and failure in their future. And yet, the research is in, almost all followers of Christ have spent much more time thinking very carefully about how to transfer their wealth to their kids and grandkids, than they have their wisdom.

And so it’s not too late, but if you take time to make an estate plan and to make a will, to think about how important it is to give them your stuff, what you want to do is translate your soul, what are your values? Teach them how to make great, great decisions.

Great decisions about God, great decisions about relationships, great decisions about money, great decisions about how to respond to adversity, great decisions about how to resolve conflict. Make wise, wise decisions about opportunities that seem too good to be true, because they are.

Wise, wise decisions about how to discover who God made them to be, wise decisions about – if they are parents – how to parent well. Wise decisions about how to take care of their bodies. One of the greatest gifts you could ever impart to those that you care about the most is the skill and the knowledge and the ability to make excellent, wise decisions.

And so our transferable concept is: Teach them to make wise choices. And what I would like to do now is say, I believe there is a place to start and if I was going to just open the Bible in the middle here and it opened to Proverbs like it did, let me read one verse as a launching point.

It’s not in your notes, here is the wisest man in the world. Past, present, future. And he says, verse 7, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Only fools despise wisdom and discipline.” The fear of the Lord.

And the fear of the Lord is reverential awe, for sure. The fear of the Lord is an emotional, He is awesome and powerful and all-knowing and pure and you are actually afraid. You are afraid not to do life His way. The fear of the Lord, both positively and negatively, part out of admiration and part out of just actual fear, is to say to God, I want to do life Your way, because You have designed it in a way for my good. And, by the way, You are God. Whether it’s for my good or not, You are God and You created me, and You say these things. And I am afraid to do anything other than what the One who created me, and deserves to have rightfully anything He wants, He can have. He made me.

And so, the fear of the Lord. And what I would like to suggest is if we are going to learn to make wise decisions, we need to walk through a theology of holiness.

And I have summarized, I didn’t put all the verses there but I have summarized a theology of holiness. Now, when you hear this word, please do not go to black robes, lit candles, prune-faced people chanting in the dark. Or people who don’t wear makeup ever or don’t play cards. Okay? I’m not talking about external holiness.

Right next to this in your notes, a theology of holiness, put a dash and write the word wholeness. W-H-O-L-E-N-E-S-S. The root word of holiness comes from wholeness. It comes from health.

The prerequisite for the universe that a perfect, holy God has made, is for it to be whole and to be healthy, it must be holy. And the fall is like cancer. And it’s like eating away at the environment, at the world, at the structure that God created.

And so, His holiness is His standard that provides health. When we live a holy life, when we follow God’s holiness, it not only is what He expects because of who He is, but it’s also His way of helping us get health in our relationships with Him and with others, and what makes us whole and complete.

And they didn’t know all the scientific stuff that we know. And when He gave multiple commands and it looked like just ceremonial holiness, they didn’t know about bacteria and they are washing their hands all the time. They didn’t know that the platelets clot at, what is it, when you circumcise a child, Purdue did a study that the platelets clot the most on that very day.

But all these standards and all these laws that God gave His people to be this holy nation were for their health and for their good and so they would reflect Him.

And so, what does it mean? What is holiness? Let’s walk through it. First, God is high and holy and the idea of holy means He is totally other. He is not a bigger, better category. He is completely different. We are creation and He is Creator. He is the source of all life. And so, He is other.

He is not the old man with the beard who nods at His children and He is not a divine Santa Claus, or He is not a cosmic vending machine. He is holy.

God is absolute truth, John 14:6. Jesus came and He said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except by Me.” God is truth.

God’s Word defines absolute truth. You might jot John 17:17, the last prayer of Jesus. “Sanctify them by Your truth. Your Word is truth.” And sanctify, that’s our same root Word for holy. Set them apart, is the idea. Something special. Not something regular.

A theology of holiness includes God’s Law, or morals, that is for our protection. When God lays out these commands, these guardrails, this is not from a prudish God that is against sex or someone that has all these rules to frustrate us and anything that we like to do, He comes up with a command to say, “Don’t do that.” They are for our protection; they are for our boundaries.

God’s aim is to make us holy and to reflect His Son. It’s a winsome, pure, not weird religious, out there, you people are, where are you coming from? holiness. It is a holiness that is loving and winsome and pure and approachable and Christlike.

When you are holy, you are like Jesus. And that is God’s agenda.

The Old Testament roots are we get Exodus chapter 3, verses 5 and 6. Moses sees the bush. God says, “Don’t come any closer; take off your sandals for the place where you’re standing is,” – remember? “holy ground.” Then He said, “‘I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, the God of Jacob.’ At this, Moses hid his face because he was afraid to look at God.”

We have lost a generation of people that are afraid to look at God. We are casual with God. We think God is going to wink at stuff. I’ve got a lot of friends in churches all around the country and as we compare notes, I will tell you, the average single person in the average evangelical church, and I’m just going to throw a statistic out, it’s probably higher than this, but the average single person in evangelical churches is sleeping around, about eighty percent of the time.

And people will just look you in the eye and say, “Well, you know, I don’t think God really expects that anymore. Like, eight out of ten commandments, that’s pretty good. Isn’t that an eighty on a test?”

We have really lost the sense of the awesome holiness and purity of God. Here we have a situation with Moses, God says, “Take off your,” – why? “Nothing artificial, man. Wherever I am, it is holy.” You find John meets Jesus, right? Revelation chapter 1? Bam! He’s on his face!

Joshua meets the angel of the Lord. We have lost the sense of God’s transcendence. He is not our buddy. He is approachable, He is immanent, He is loving, He is kind. But He is unapproachable light and purity and holiness.

Isaiah caught it in Isaiah chapter 6. Listen to the verse, “In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord,” – what was He like? “high and exalted; and the train of His robe filled the temple. Above Him were seraphim,” special angels, “each with six wings: With two they covered their faces, and with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling out to one another: ‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty; the whole earth is full of His glory.’”

This is the only time you ever find God addressed as three different things. In Hebrew, they don’t have, I can’t even remember what you call them in English. We say “very good,” or “best,” or “better.” They don’t have that in Hebrew. The way you make a stronger statement, it’s, “Holy,” or you go, “Holy, holy,” or if you want to make it, “Holy, holy, holy,” it’s a majestic, exponential, it’s, whoo.

And that’s what the angels were doing then and, according to the book of Revelation, that’s what they are doing now. And there’s going to come a day where they are going to keep doing it and we are going to get in on it.

But that’s who God is. And these are perfect angelic beings that are of the higher ups. I don’t understand all the cherubim and seraphim and who knows how all that works. But I’ll tell you what, they are in the very presence of God, night and day.

Later we find out they have eyes all over them and there is all this wisdom and they are innocent and they are pure. And yet, in the presence of God, they hide their face and they cover their feet and they declare who He is. I will tell you, when you get a glimpse of who God really is, it changes everything.

And you have this process that I think needs to happen. The old word for it is, repentance and renewal.

But it’s this process where we get into the Scriptures, and in community and in worship, where we, again, get a glimpse of who God really is, which leads to an accurate view of ourselves, which leads to a realignment of our agenda with His.

And that process is over and over and over in Scripture. And that has to happen with us. And it’s painful. Sitting quietly before God, worshipping God for who He is, versus just asking and telling and whining and complaining. We can do all that. But we need to come before God and worship Him for who He is and remember who He is and then ask Him to, by His searching light, pray the prayer that David prayed, “Search me, O God, and know my heart. Test me, examine me, see if there is anything in me.”

And you know what? Then sit quietly and unless you’re living on a different planet than I am, He will show you stuff. And you just need to get the fiery flame of the holiness of God to purge you and purge me and allow Him to do that and then we recognize with a new level, how unworthy we are. And guess what that does – the work of Jesus then becomes very precious because you realize, without Him, you’re in big trouble. And so the cross takes on new meaning.

The biblical profiles are Moses and Stephen. I like the Hebrews passage where it says Moses chose to be mistreated for a time than live in a pagan culture and enjoy the pleasures of Egypt. There is a price tag to be holy.

And Stephen, you have this, when they chose Stephen, remember Acts chapter 6? “Choose from you men who are full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom.” And the very first name is Stephen. He is a holy man. He is filled with the Holy Spirit and wisdom.

And then chapter 7, what do we have? We have Stephen making this defense and they bring these trumped up charges. And as he is looking up, God gives him a vision of Jesus next to the throne. And you have courage when you’re holy and you have boldness when you’re holy. And you know the Word of God, because He goes through the entire history of Israel when you’re holy.

And then he gets to the end and you have a forgiving heart. “Father, forgive them. Please don’t take this into account.” That’s what a holy life looks like. Not people who dress funny or put, “Praise the Lord!” on the back of their cars or have big, black Bibles.

Holiness is a quality of life that is winsome and loving and Word-centered and deeply caring and morally pure.

The New Testament command is 1 Peter 15 and 16, “But just as He who called you is holy, so be holy,” – in your notes, will you circle the word all? “in all you do. For it is written: ‘Be holy, because I am holy.’”

In all you do. In what you watch. In what you put into your mind. In what comes out of your mouth. In what goes into your mouth. In what you say. In what you think. Be holy in all that you do.

Holiness is not an option. The Scripture says, “Without holiness, no one will see the Lord.” Holiness is not external religious activity. Holiness is a condition of the heart, a purity of the mind that expresses itself in a righteous lifestyle.

And then notice the great promise: “Blessed are the pure in heart,” because what do they get? They see God.

And at the end of the day, that’s God’s heart’s desire. And you’ll never get greater reward. Just see God, know Him for who He is.

And, by the way, that’s how transformation occurs. 1 John will tell us we don’t know exactly what we are going to be like, but this is what we know, 1 John 3:2: When we see Him, we will be like Him.
Paul would say in 2 Corinthians 3 when he is talking about the difference between the Old and the New Covenant. He goes, “But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed,” process, “from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.”

And his point is, as we get these glimpses of who God really is, how loving He is, how holy He is, how pure He is. You know what? And when you have that attitude it’s not like I get, Okay, read a chapter a day, keep the devil away. Or, I read five chapters. I feel really holy today. God, what do you think? Can I get a little star on the refrigerator up there? I prayed for fifteen point seven minutes. I fasted for two whole days.

Those are all performance mentalities. I read because I love You. Would You speak to me? I fasted because I am not clear and I don’t know what to do and I want to eliminate the distractions. I get no brownie points. I’m not better than anyone else. I just need to pull away from the world because I need to hear Your voice. Will You speak to me? I love You.

I want to sing to God because He is my Savior in what He has done, and I forget that. That is what holiness looks like.

And then you begin to pass on and give to others what God has given to you. On the application, it says, “I”. I would like you, if you would be so bold, to write your name in there, commit to learn how to discern good from evil. That’s the heart of becoming holy.

See, the problem is we have a real, real hard time in our day. You are living in a mirage, in a mirage of lies and appearances. And Paul would pray, we’ll look at it a little bit later in Philippians 1. He would pray that God would grant them the ability to discern good from evil.

Isaiah, in his day, would say the world and the religious leaders, he would say, “You know what’s happened is now we are calling evil ‘good,’ and good ‘evil.’” And I don’t know about you, but I see that today, everywhere.

So how do you pass this on? How do you pass on this view of God, this sense of holiness? Because if holiness has to do with being whole and health and if God, because of the nature of who He is demands holiness for the health of His universe, and when people violate that holiness, there are consequences because God is pure.

When a parent lets anyone do something that is harmful for them, over and over, without consequences, you don’t love them! Proverbs says the evidence of love, and Hebrews 12 says the evidence of real love is when a parent disciplines.

So when we step outside of God’s moral law and boundaries and He brings consequences, what He is saying is, “I love you. Because you keep doing that, you’re going to get hurt badly. You’re going to get hurt really badly. That attitude is going to bring pain. That behavior is going to bring pain. You keep logging on to that site, you’re going to lose affection for your wife. You keep chatting around and reading those romance novels, and creating this ultra-world that you hide in and have this virtual world, I’ll tell you what, it’ll ruin your marriage. You keep letting your kids hang out with that group, I will tell you, they are going to land in the ditch.”

And so, He says there is this standard of holiness, but the standard of holiness is built out of blocks or bricks of love to bring about health and wholeness. So let’s talk about maybe some practical ways – how do we pass this on so they can make wise decisions?

Number one: Encourage them to saturate their mind with truth. The Bible, great books, videos. You have in your notes, this is one of my favorite passages, Romans chapter 8, verses 5 through 8. It says, “Those who live according to the flesh have their mind set on the flesh; but those who live according to the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace. The sinful mind is hostile toward God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. And those who are controlled by the sinful nature or the flesh cannot please God.”

All I want you to get is: Where do you set your mind? Where do you set your mind?

The second is: Encourage them to hang out regularly with wise, godly people. Proverbs 13:20, “He who dwells with wise men will be wise, but the companion of a fool will suffer harm.”

There is a great line, I got this from, it was in a casual conversation and it was with a vice president of a guy that I work with. And his wife was there, and we were talking about the influence of kids and you’re always worried about who they hang out with. And she just turned to all of us and said, “Well, I’ll tell you, you show me your friends, I’ll show you your future.”

Man, I don’t know where she got that. I wrote that down and I’ve been using it since and when I can remember to give her credit, I do. Like now. But it’s true.

Think of who you are investing in. You need, if you have control, you need to be very careful about who they hang out with.

Third, model for them how to ask God for discernment and wisdom. It’s really important for those you are trying to help that you don’t become like, “The Answer Man,” or, “The Answer Woman.” Well, what should I do about this? You know more than me. Well, can you tell me? And you say, “Well, da, da, da, da, da, do this or do that.”

Model for them, “You know what? Here’s a passage in James chapter 1 verse 5, okay? ‘If any man lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all men generously and without reproach. But when he asks, let him ask in faith, for the one who doubts is like double-minded man who is tossed here and there by the waves. Don’t let that person expect to receive anything from the Lord.’”

And then you explain to them, “Wisdom is doing life God’s way, according to His design. He will always show you what to do. The Bible doesn’t tell you what state to live in. The Bible doesn’t tell you what vocation. The Bible doesn’t say you ought to go to a Christian school or a non-Christian school. You need wisdom from God.”

And so what you want to model for them is, “I don’t have the answer to that, but God makes a promise.” And the thesis of that text of not ever doubting is not that you never have doubts about God. Everyone has doubts.

Most of us, myself completely included, I want to get God lined up to get Him to do what I want because I think I know what’s best. It’s that surrender to be willing to do it. And you have to model that.

This is where, don’t say stuff like, my kids, when they were hitting the mid-teens, it would be something like, “Hey, I want to do this or that or go to this movie or do that,” and I would think, You know, that’s not good. But if am I going to keep making every decision, we are going to be in trouble.

And so, I would often say, “Well, would you do me a favor?” “Yeah.” I said, “Pray about it for twenty-four hours. And just really think it through. Do you believe God wants you to go do that?” “Well, Dad…” “I know. Hey, don’t argue with me. Just talk to God about it. I’m just asking you.”

And, again, you take that responsibility instead of the power trip, “I said no!” What you want to do is start helping them. “I want to buy this, I want to go here, I want to do that.”

And if you’re not sure but down deep in your heart you think, You know, that’s probably not a very good thing, but it won’t kill them whatever they do, I always wanted to give them a lot more rope and say, “Why don’t you pray about it?”

And by the way, this parental thing we have of wanting to protect our kids from pain, is not real smart. What you want to do is not protect them from small pain so it hurts really badly. Like, Gosh, I just spent twenty-five dollars on this wacky thing and it looks so dumb and now I wore it to school and it wasn’t even cool and I blew twenty-five bucks. Good!

Or, I decided to go on this thing and, man, everyone did this terrible stuff and I wish I never would have been there. Good. See, if you always tell them what to do and you always keep them inside your bounds, then what happens is they can’t wait to get away to go try some stuff.

So you want to develop them hearing God’s voice. You want to model for them how to get wisdom, how to discern.

Another practical thing with your kids is, you know that little clicker when you’re watching something? As much as I will talk a little bit later about limiting media. My kids, it was like, I believe every moment is a teachable moment.

And you don’t go overboard. But, okay, you’re watching the Super Bowl, right? And so these commercials come on. And they spent, what? How many zillion dollars to create this commercial? They are paying one point five million dollars for thirty seconds.

And here is a girl that she’s got it cut down to here and pushed up to there and pulled down to here and another guy that’s been on steroids and he’s got his Coors Light and this that, this that, and the music comes on: bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. And then, stop! Okay. Before we watch the rest of the game. What was the message of that? Okay? Where are they coming at us, and why? What are they selling to us? What do you think? Okay. Why do you think she’s dressed that way? Okay. Why does he have that? What’s the message?

And what are you doing? You are helping them discern good from evil. And so, and then you watch this real silky movie and it makes you cry and it’s really good and it’s really warm and there’s no sex in it and there’s no violence in it. The only problem is, in this movie, the person that you identify with is married to this not very nice person. And so, this person married to the not very nice person falls in love with someone else and they have an affair and there’s music and they are going out and da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

And we are all crying and thinking, Oh, I’m glad she finally found love in her life and it was a popular movie and everyone loves it. And you stop the thing and you say, Wait a second. Wait a second. I got sucked in just like you but what did she do? We all love her and she was the pretty one and the music was really playing and all the violins. And her life was so hard before. Right?

Okay, let’s rewind. It’s called adultery. So how does that play out in real life? Let’s go through some families in the church where someone committed adultery. Let’s remember what that looked like. Let’s remember what it did to their… Do you understand what I’m saying? That’s what you do. So, it’s not a classroom. It’s every moment of every…

Now, by the way, don’t stop at every commercial. Some of your kids are going, Get out of here. But you get it.

Finally, teach them to monitor their exposure to the media. Teach them to monitor their exposure to the media. Romans 12:2, we touched on it earlier. “Do not be conformed to this world,” this present world system; not the physical world, it’s the cosmos. It’s the world system and 1 John tells us what it is made of: The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.

The way to help your kids is this is like Fortune, Cosmo, and People magazine. Okay? That’s the world. If you can have her body like that, Cosmo or Seventeen or what else, then, or Muscle Magazine, Men’s Fitness. “You can get tight abs, baby, in six seconds a day.” And with the right drugs.

Or People, if you can just be famous, right? The whole goal is to be an American Idol. I want to be famous! I want people to know me! I will say ridiculous things on TV. I will go on reality shows and make a complete fool of myself doing things with a camera that I would never do privately, even in my own home. But I have to because I’m on TV! And isn’t that the epitome of all of life? I’m famous now! No, you’re an idiot now.

But your kids, your grandkids, the people you are discipling are getting, boom, ba boom, boom, ba boom. They are bombarded. And so, when they go to buy something, what is it? The clothes are that way, the media is that way, the magazines are that way. You will never be whole and healthy instead of being deceived and seduced unless you say, “Stop allowing yourself to be molded by this world system.”

So, you’ve got to put a real barrier in media and how much you watch and what you watch.

My kids heard it a zillion times and the people I have had an opportunity to help disciple. What you allow to go into your mind is the most important decision you make every day. Way more than what goes into your mouth.

Like, my wife is really healthy, this is organic and this doesn’t have any pesticides. We are really into eating good, healthy things. But, boy, you’ve got to put healthy stuff in your brain. You are the product of your thought life. You understand that?

“As a man thinks,” as a woman thinks, “in his heart, so you become.” You watch enough TV, you rent enough videos, you glance through enough magazines, it will create desires that you can never fulfill and you will never be satisfied and you will get sucked in. And the lure, right in, and bam!

And, by the way, when you live this kind of life, this is where people will start thinking you’re weird, because we are living in a day where, according to Barna, I don’t know how accurate, but according to Barna, about one out of every ten or one out of every twelve people who say, “I am a Christian, I am born again, I have prayed to receive Jesus Christ as my Savior,” about one out of every ten or twelve are living the life. The others have either a mental or…

Now, I’m not saying they’re not believers, I don’t know. I’m just saying that they may have the living Spirit of the living God living in them but their external behavior, their values, their honesty, their commitment to marriage, their lifestyle, their speech, their priorities, and their values are exactly the same as their non-Christian friends. Because you are what you eat.

And if you don’t believe me, this is a mature group, so I will go way out on a limb. For you younger ones who want a mild challenge, go on a three-day media fast. Okay? No rent, no TV, don’t get on and surf the Internet, media fast. Get in the car, no talk radio. You can, positive music, teaching, okay. Three days, no TV, no media.

You’ll get antsy. Some of you will find you have an addiction. Because when you walk in, you turn it on. Some of you are like me that when I do watch TV and as soon as a commercial comes, I’m bored. So I can watch four shows at one time to relax, of course.

And then I’m exhausted when I’m done. I have to be, this game, this game, this game. Ohio State is doing this, this, and then part of this movie, this. Mmmm!

You go on a three-day media fast, and I will tell you, you will be, one, you will have all this time you didn’t think you had. Go on a ten-day media fast. For some of you, you will try and it’ll be scary because you can’t do it.

Go on a ten-day media fast, then sit down and watch just general prime-time TV. You will be shocked. That’s how desensitized we have become. You will be shocked at what comes out of people’s mouths, you will be shocked at the sexual innuendo, you will be shocked and you will see stuff that you have grown accustomed to, in terms of how people are dressed and different things that will stir your flesh that doesn’t even register now.

And it’s the classic, what’s the illustration that you put the frog in the water and if you heat it up real slowly, it won’t jump out? We have a whole generation that isn’t jumping out. And here’s the sadness. Then we reap the consequences, even though it’s not a willful, volitional, “I hate God,” sin – you just reap the consequences of an un-whole and unholy life. Because holiness is the demand of God to keep His universe healthy. So there are consequences when I put junk in my mouth, junk in my head. It creates a set of desires.

And so, limiting the video games, the violence, the sexuality. You are just going to be a spiritual salmon swimming upstream with your fellow friends and other people thinking you are weird.

Now, is this: never watch TV? Of course not. This is really asking yourself, Is this good, honorable, right, praiseworthy? Is this in the Philippians 4:8 criteria? Does this draw me closer to God or pull me farther away?

And, by the way, for me, sometimes it’s just good stuff. I just have a limit. After about two hours of TV, even a great game, and I love sports. I just find I get spiritually desensitized. And I’m different than you, I don’t know, some of you can take a lot more than me. But if you take seriously what goes into your mind and then substitute it, you will see dramatic life change. Dramatic life change.

What is the message? Living holy lives is how we get God’s best. Holy living allows you to experience God’s best for your life. Let’s move holiness out of this idea of the otherworldly, dark robes, something weird and let’s move it into becoming whole, healthy, pure, winsome, loving, and receiving that chalet life that God has in every relationship, in every area of your life.